I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
