My boss' voice literally gives me gas
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
