So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Randomize