Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Please, let me fuck your mom
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
