do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Randomize
