i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
