Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(509): View more from Washington

I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?

(1-509): View more from Washington

talent.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.

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(917): View more from New York City

I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.

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(813): View more from Florida

he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there

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(678): View more from Georgia

Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.

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(727): View more from Florida

My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Can I chase this vodka with an onion?

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(913): View more from Kansas

I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock

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