Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
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