weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
My hand turned me down
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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