Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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