You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I just blew my weed a kiss
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
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