my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
You took a bar mat shot.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
