dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
