So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
