Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
well you can't waste a boner
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
