I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
it hurts more in the daytime
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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