if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize