I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize