I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I deserve to be covered in dicks
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
