well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
