booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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