From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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