this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
