it wasn't lemon gatorade
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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