I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
