he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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