did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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