Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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