Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Is it penis luge time yet?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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