can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
