ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
