You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
