so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize