im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
accomplished twins. life is a go
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
