She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
