Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
