Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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