quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
