New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
