I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
