How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
why do cheetos always look like penises
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
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