you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
