People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
You don't make any sense
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