I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
All the doctor said was why
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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