remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
