Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Randomize
