you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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