There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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