Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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