you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
