and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I understand Curling. That high.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
